KEEPING YOUR COOL PARENTING
A 334 page interactive workbook for parents who want a calmer, more joyful family life.
You’ve tried every trick, from every book. Followed the advice from well-meaning loved ones, healthcare practitioners and educational professionals. Watched the TV shows. Read the magazine articles...
But you’re still tiptoeing around your child, fearful that every ‘no’ might ignite a tantrum that’ll leave both of you even more exhausted than you are already.
You don’t want to run your family like a dictatorship, gaining control through fear and threats (and that probably wouldn’t work anyway).
And neither do you want to spend all day talking about emotions, being overly chummy with your child, and having the family revolve around their wants and needs.
That's quite a predicament you're in there. And you'll be relieved to know there's a way out.
Firstly, your child is lucky to have someone who cares enough to want to improve their family life.
Secondly…..here’s why those parenting tools and strategies you’ve been taught for changing your child’s behaviour aren’t working….
Rewards, threats and punishments are intended to motivate your child to change their behaviour.
But your child doesn’t need motivation. They need help to learn self-mastery, to be able to successful calm themselves down, control their own behaviour and see possibilities for meeting their needs in healthy ways.
And NO amount of rewards, threats or punishments is going to give them the tools they need to do that. It will simply add to their frustration, making everything worse.
This workbook will teach you a different way.
A different way that works. I know, because it's how I transformed our family life.
And it’s the approach I’ve used to help hundreds of families as a parenting coach.
Hi, I’m Camilla, the UK’s first Language of Listening® Master Coach, and I’ve got a pretty good idea how you’re feeling right now.
By 2014, I was desperate for a solution to our volatile home life.
My 5-year old daughter’s behaviour was out of control and I was beginning to dread every interaction with her.
I worried for her future: ‘If she’s like this now, what’s she going to be like as a teenager?’
I felt indignant about our relationship: ‘After all I do for her, how dare she treat me like that?’
But mostly I was disappointed with myself: ‘I’m not good enough. I can’t control my daughter.’
I tried everything, rewards, punishments, time-out.
Everything I did in the moment just made the moment worse and her outbursts seemed to escalate in frequency and intensity.
I wanted to enjoy family life, but instead found myself wishing the years away.
Sound familiar? So you'll know how eager I was to find a better way.
I eventually discovered the Language of Listening, a radically different approach to parenting, and it had such a profound impact on our family life that I trained for three years to become the UK’s first qualified master coach.
Over the last three years I’ve helped hundreds of parents through my coaching. And now to help more parents restore harmony to their homes, I’ve invested hundreds of hours in creating this workbook.
Let go of trying to control the moment, and empower your child with skills for life.
Inside Keeping Your Cool Parenting Workbook
The Keeping Your Cool Parenting workbook is based on the teaching and exercises I’ve completed with hundreds of families over the years, and includes a blend of:
Actionable steps and skills to transform your parenting
Theory behind this approach so you understand why and how it works
Examples for different ages to help you apply what you learn to your own child
Questions that create deep insights into how you and your child interact with (and react to) each other
Exercises to help you apply what you’ve learned in real-life
Section One: Building awareness
If we don’t understand the impact of the way we currently interact with our child, or why we respond in this way we can’t make positive changes. Awareness is the first step to change.
Reflection questions to help you connect with how you want your family life to be
Why your child reacts the way they do
Why rewards and punishments don’t work (and how they might be making your situation worse)
Reflection questions to help you better understand your experience of being parented and parenting so far
What misbehaviour really means and how to handle it in a way that enhances (not erodes) the relationship you have with your child
4 parenting mistakes that shut down connection and communication - you’ll want to avoid these
The invisible influence that’s changing how you perceive your child
3 core steps of the Language of Listening approach and how to apply them to different ages
Questions to help you put the approach into practice
5 ways you can help you child to develop healthy self-esteem (plus the essential foundational work that starts with you)
How to break the cycle of escalation without ‘giving in’ or being overly permissive
What to do when your child is stonewalling you with a ‘NO!’
Section Two: Making Sense of Behaviours
We'll explore why your child’s behaviour makes perfect sense even if you don’t like it. Then you’ll get tools to achieve more willing cooperation, see a reduction in arguments and be able to support your child to find their own solutions while holding firm with your boundaries.
The constructive and collaborative way to address your child’s behaviour
How to respond in a calm and constructive way when your child is behaving in a way you don’t like
The 3 healthy needs that drive your child’s behaviour
What unwanted behaviour really means and how to respond to it in a way that improves your relationship and their self-esteem
How to create and hold healthy boundaries (and no, your options aren’t limited to show them who’s boss vs giving in to their demands)
Saving yourself and your child from the generational pattern of people-pleasing
How to help your child navigate not suppress or dismiss their emotions
Section Three: Empowering Your Child
We’re often told to point out our child’s flaws in the mistaken belief that it will change their behaviour. But the most effective and empowering way for children to learn is through success. In order for your child to see their inner greatness, you have to see it first.
Why praise doesn’t work and what to do instead so you respond in a way that brings out the best in your child.
A simple but effective tool to help you see the strength behind perceived negative traits or behaviours
How to help your child use their own self-control and
5 ways you can create opportunities that bring out the best in your child so they can use their capabilities, self control and self-motivation to manage their own behaviour
What to do when you and your partner aren’t on the same page
How to put your new tools together to handle tricky situations with confidence, empower your child, and empower yourself to build the family life you truly want.
Imagine being able to handle any situation your child throws at you and turn any negative situation into a positive one.
By having tools that really work, you’ll actually get to feel good as a parent while holding boundaries and getting WILLING cooperation.
This workbook empowers you with practical strategies and insights to navigate the challenges of parenting, helping you foster a peaceful environment and reclaim harmony in your household.
Not because your child won’t ever act out - but because when they do, you’ll know what to do.
Let go of trying to control the moment, and empower your child with skills for life.
Have a question? Message me now.
Thank you for getting in touch!
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Have a great day!
FAQs
Maybe it’s just a phase and you can wait it out?
This isn’t a phase, this is an opportunity.
Now is the time to coach your child to develop the self-mastery skills they need to enjoy a successful life with healthy relationships.
If you wait it out you’ll soon have a young adult getting into adult-sized problems with adult-sized consequences because they don’t have the self-control they need to manage their own impulses and emotions.
Is this the same as Gentle Parenting or Conscious Parenting?
No. Language of Listening® (the framework this workbook is built on) is the first approach that puts equal importance on the wants and needs of both the child and the parent - which is essential for a happy, calm family life. The approach goes beyond acknowledging emotions, and shows you how to coach your child as they develop their own self-control.
What age children does this workbook work for?
The great thing about Language of Listening is that it's a coaching model based on how humans work. It's not a new set of techniques for each stage of your child's life, it's a new language that you can use for all age children. - it works great with other family members too. Many of my clients tell me it's helped their marriage, the relationship with in-laws and at work.
WhatMy child has ADHD, ASD. PDD (or other additional needs) - will this workbook work for me?
Yes! Language of Listening is a valuable resource, it enables you to adapt its principles to your child's specific challenges and strengths and tailoring it to suit your child's individual needs.
I want to make my child do as they're told - will this workbook help?
Remember, it's about building a strong and trusting connection with your child, which in turn makes them more likely to cooperate because they want to, not just because they have to. So yes, this book is a valuable resource on your journey toward achieving cooperation and harmony in your parenting.
How do I know the tools you teach in this workbook will work?
These tools are based on solid principles from transformational coaching, positive psychology and play therapy. which have been proven to strengthen parent-child relationships, foster cooperation and bring out the best in you and your child. Having transformed my family life for the better and supported hundreds of families to raise their children the Language of Listening way, I know what I teach you will work for your family too.
I've had many parents test my workbook to ensure it's easy to use, read, and apply what you learn. See what they had to say!